Hah-Hah!!!

had a great laugh last night after dinner with my staffhouse mates. we laughed-out-loud 'til it hurt! good thing we didn't thow-up the food we ate. my worry is alfred, who was "Extra-Challenged" by joyce to drink a bowl of the (extra-)sour sinigang he cooked for dinner. he did, and his lips where white after that! all for the sake of KFC lunch and dinner. he was able to hold back the bowl of sinigang he drank despite the stomach-cramping laughs. we talked about staff house history too, and Nancy's tae-bo costume topped the stories that night, beating even alfred's stunt. it was a nice, fun and bonding moment. and a good stretching exercise too!

here are more laughs:


Don't Quote Me Again!


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Question: If you could live forever, would you and why?
Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever."
- Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss Universe contest

~ sakit sa ulo! buti na lang di siya immortal!

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"Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country."
- Mayor Marion Barry, Washington, DC
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"I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body."-
-Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward

~hah-hah! pa neuro-surgery ka na!
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"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that but not with all those flies and death and stuff."
- Mariah Carey, pop singer

~duh! so stupidly coniotic!
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"I'm not going to have some reporters pawing through our papers. We are the president."
- Hillary Clinton, commenting on the release of subpoenaed documents.
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"The police are not here to create disorder. They're here to preserve disorder."
- Chicago Mayor Richard Daley during the 1968 Democratic convention.

~well-put!
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"China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese."
- Former French President Charles de Gaulle

~uy trivia toh ah!
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"I haven't committed a crime. What I did was fail to comply with the law."
- David Dinkins, former New York City Mayor, answering accusations that he failed to pay his taxes.

~lulusot pa...
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"The Internet is a great way to get on the Net."
- Former Republican presidential candidate and Senator, Bob Dole

~o_0
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"Things are more like they are now than they ever were before."
- Former U.S. President Dwight D. Eisenhower
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"Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas."
- Former Australian cabinet minister Keppel Enderbery
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"We're going to turn this team around 360 degrees."
- Jason Kidd, upon being drafted by the Dallas Mavericks

~pwede din 2pi radians back to where you started
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"Researchers have discovered that chocolate produces some of the same reactions in the brain as marijuana.... The researchers also discovered other similarities between the two, but can't remember what they are."
- Matt Lauer, host of NBC's Today show
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"It's like an Alcatraz around my neck."
- Boston mayor on the shortage of city parking spaces

~sorry, dehins ko getz talaga eh
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"They're multi-purpose. Not only do they put the clips on, but they take them off."
- Pratt & Whitney spokesperson explaining why the company charged the Air Force nearly $1,000 for an ordinary pair of pliers.
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"I was recently on a tour of Latin America, and the only regret I have was that I didn't study Latin harder in school so I could converse with those people."
- Former U.S. Vice-President Dan Quayle

~shux!!! ganun pala yun!!! 0_0
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"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it."
- Former U.S. Vice-President Dan Quayle

~tama naman eh. kelangan specific!
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"The streets are safe in Philadelphia. It's only the people who make them unsafe."
- Frank Rizzo, ex-police chief and mayor of Philadelphia

~i therefore conclude...it's indeed safe
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"Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life."
- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for a federal anti-smoking campaign.

~wahahahaha!!!!!!!!! ayos na spokesperson toh ah!
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"The president has kept all of the promises he intended to keep."
- Former Clinton aide George Stephanopolous speaking on "Larry King Live".
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"That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass, and I'm just the one to do it."
- A congressional candidate in Texas

~what you call a subtle self-proclamation!
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"Without censorship, things can get terribly confused in the public mind."
- General William Westmoreland, during the war in Viet Nam
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"What would this country be without this great land of ours?"
- Former President Ronald Reagan Some 40% of female gas station employees in Metro Detroit are women, up from almost none a year ago. -- Detroit News article
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"When more and more people are thrown out of work, unemployment results."
-Former U.S. President Calvin Coolidge

~note: stated matter-of-factly pa toh...
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"It's like deja vu all over again."
-Yogi Berra

~ and again, and again, and again...
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"The loss of life will be irreplaceable."
-Former U.S. Vice-President Dan Quayle on the San Francisco earthquake

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"It is necessary for me to establish a winner image. Therefore, I have to beat somebody."
- Richard M. Nixon

~toink!

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"The government is not doing enough about cleaning up the environment. This is a good planet."
-Mr. New Jersey contestant when asked what he would do with a million dollars.

~bakit di na lang kasi sinagot ang classic "world peace" answer eh. duh...

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"When I have been asked during these last weeks who caused the riots
and the killing in L.A., my answer has been direct and simple: Who is
to blame for the riots? The rioters are to blame. Who is to blame for
the killings? The killers are to blame."
-Former U.S. Vice-President Dan Quayle on the complex social issues
behind the Los Angeles Riots

~me points siya dun...klap-klap!


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"A billion here, a billion there, sooner or later it adds up to real money."
-Everett Dirksen

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"A verbal contract isn't worth the paper it's written on."
-Samuel Goldwyn

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"Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and child. "
-Former U.S. Vice-President Dan Quayle on Republican family values

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"Half this game is ninety percent mental."
- Philadelphia Phillies manager Danny Ozark

~manager po siya, di mathematician kaya accept niyo na.

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"I don't feel we did wrong in taking this great country away from them. There were great numbers of people who needed new land, and the Indians were selfishly trying to keep it for themselves."
-John Wayne

~pffffttttt...baaaaaaaaaadddddd...

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"What a waste it is to lose one's mind. Or not to have a mind is being very wasteful. How true that is."
-Former U.S. Vice-President Dan Quayle at a fund-raising event for the United Negro College Fund. He was attempting to quote the line "a mind is a terrible thing to waste"

~bise presidente ba talaga toh?nakakarami na siya ah!

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"If you let that sort of thing go on, your bread and butter will be cut right out from under your feet."
-Former British foreign minister Ernest Bevin

~di ako matawa kasi di ko gets

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"I love California. I practically grew up in Phoenix."
-Former U.S. Vice-President Dan Quayle

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"I stand by all the misstatements that I've made."
-Former U.S. Vice-President Dan Quayle

~too many to mention